This post is about boobs
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Got your attention, haven’t I?
Bloody perverts.
However, this post came about after I told a colleague that Keira Knightley is within the top few of FHM’s Annual 100 Sexiest Women in the World poll.
She came in 12th, even though some reports claimed that she was top. The sexiest woman is apparently Jessica Alba.
Personally, I think that the voters are blind. I would go for Keira Knightley anytime, any day of the week. Just look and compare for yourself.
Here's Keira, looking smoldering as usual.
And here's Jessica, who looks like a tranny.
So, I told my colleague that Keira Knightley was amongst the top rankers for this year, and she was really surprised. Her first reaction was to say that ‘Keira Knightley doesn’t even have boobs!’, or something to that effect.
I could not find something to retort her with, because I think she was actually telling the truth.
However, I decided to take boobs really seriously. I fasted by steering clear of dairy products and spent 2 hours everyday in office musing about boobs. And my hard (no pun intended) work has paid off gloriously.
I arrived at the conclusion that boobs are overrated. Seriously.
Just look:
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Where was I?
Overrated, right. Yes, they are overrated.
This is because they are ubiquitous. Every other person in the world has a pair. Your mum has a pair, your granny has a pair, your sister has a pair, that butch in St Nicholas has a pair, heck, even my friend Amos has a pair!
So what’s the big deal with boobs?
They are just fats with a nipple on it. You see your thigh? Graft a nipple on it, and voila! Here’s a boob-above-the-knee. Who knows? One day, some scientist might even invent a removable nipple, and people can put it on their butts.
Put the nipples on, and you get two boobs. Take them off, and you get a butt. Makes things easier, doesn’t it?
And, as I mentioned earlier, boobs are everywhere. There are six billion people in the world, and half of it is made up of women. That means there are approximately three billion pairs of boobs to go around. I figured that it is more than enough, even if all the women turned lesbian overnight.
This is because there are three billion pairs of boobs. That means that there are six billion individual boobs scattered all over the world. Just enough for everyone. Isn’t that sweet?
If you are confused by all these statistical data, just look at this picture again:
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Uh, I think I need to go.
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on Thursday, May 03, 2007 at 7:59 AM.
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