My harrowing experience at the hair salon
Friday, February 16, 2007
I spent my Valentine's Day with three other guys at a coffeeshop acting like Teletubbies.
I was Dipsy.
I am serious.
Now that I got the 'What did you do on Valentine's?' question out of the way, it is time for me to proceed on to describing my harrowing experience at the hair salon.
My usual hairstylist, Alvin, was extremely busy on that day, with his hands bogged down by the leaden weight of the latest fashion magazine. I did not make an appointment with him, so I had to make do with a junior stylist.
I guess that's what happens when you become a Senior, you read magazines in the name of self-improvement, while others flutter around like bees.
Anyhow, the junior stylist was quite cool, in a way. He was wearing a short-sleeved yellow floral shirt. He had bronze hair that spread out in different directions all over his head. The hair was big, seriously. Heck, he even left the first button of his shirt unbuttoned. For concision purposes, I shall call him 'Sunshine~'.
Even though Sunshine~ looked a bit too cool for the hairstyling business, he was downright serious about it. He paced around me, looking at my head at different angles. Finally, he informed me that he 'will have to cut it shorter.' I agreed with him, considering that I didn't really want any extensions on my hair.
He proceeded with the haircut. It turned out that my hair indeed became shorter, as he promised earlier. I was pleasantly surprised.
Then it took a turn for the worse.
It was time for the washing and we went to the washing area. He made me lie down and proceeded to wash my hair. He then started to massage my head with some shampoo. It was nice at first, then the strangling started.
Yep, strangling.
He started to grab my neck from behind, repeatedly. I was struggling to breath. I thought about the sign at the door and remembered clearly that it said 'Haircut (washing incl.) - $21' instead of 'Haircut (washing and strangling incl.) - $21'. I decided that I could be wrong and started to blame myself for not reading properly. Who could have missed 'strangling'?
I thought about my parents and how I've let them down. I blinked back a tear, partly due to my realisation that they have let me down on more occasions, and that I am going to die with my head in a sink.
Just as I was about to scream for help, the strangling stopped. Sunshine~ asked me to stand up and go back to the chair. I duly obliged.
He dried my hair and asked if it was nice. I thought that I now looked like Bert from Sesame Street. My neck started to hurt and I remembered the previous ordeal. I said my new hairstyle is awesome, and that the kids will love it. Sunshine~ smiled.
I am safe!
I paid up, $21 in total, and left, but not before taking a last look at the sign. I swore it said 'Haircut (wash incl.) - $21'.
I guess I got a freebie.
Oh, and by the way, Weilong was Tinky-Winky, Yang Bing was Laa-laa and Wilson was Po. Just thought that you might wanna know.
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