My mum bought a large pack of lavender scented soap bars for me.
Yes, I still use soap bars. In fact, I absolutely dig them. Seriously. Soap bars are just like roll-on deodorant: nobody wants to share them. I absolutely hate sharing anything, hence, that rules shower foams out. A shared soap-bar would just be too gross. Imagine, you could be rubbing your groin with the very face of the soap your mum or sis just wiped their armpits with. Or even worse, their nether regions.
Having explained my passion for alkaline fat bars, I would like to state my distaste for smelling like an AirWick, or in layman terms, smelling of lavender.
Come on, I'm a man. I should smell manly, husky, sweaty even, but definitely not like a flower!
My Mum saw my expression when I first laid eyes on that unholy package. It was nothing short of a grimace.
"Is anything wrong?"
Yes, a million and one. Probably starting with the trivial matter of gay-smelling soap.
"No Mum, nothing's wrong. Just appreciating the soap you got for me. Thanks Mum, you're one of the greatest Mums I've ever got."
She chuckled, but paused after a while. She must have landed mentally on my second sentence.
It's been pouring the last few days and my nice kinky little floral umbrella has been overworked.
At the same time, though, I'm really happy with the weather. Seriously. For example, it gives me a valid excuse not to jog. I have this friend, Wilson, who has a really big head and always wants me to jog.
Wilson: Today's Thursday, let's jog. Me: It's raining. Wilson: If it stops, let's jog. Me: The track will be slippery. Wilson: Just be careful, and you won't slip so easily. Me: Oh well, okay, let's jog. It's a nice weather to just slack to, though. Wilson: ... True.
Escaped from jogging.
Last Tuesday, however, the weather gave me another nice present. Wilson woke up late, as usual, and had to take half a day off work. Must be having trouble lifting that head of his.
Anyhow, I took my usual transport, Mr James' Bus, and went to MINDEF as usual. It was pouring like crazy, and I juggled between using my floral umbrella inside my bag, or just running into office through the rain. I couldn't imagine myself running around a Ministry holding a floral umbrella, so I had to settle for the latter.
So when we arrived at MINDEF, I was pretty set to just hold my hands above my head and try to shield the rain. As I walked towards the first uncoveredarea, I began to reach inside my thick, armyman spirit and mentally said, "Okay, here go-"
"Do you have an umbrella?"
What?
It took me a while to gather my senses. This cute girl was asking me if I had an umbrella, while holding her own in her hand. Somehow, it wouldn't be very nice if I said "Ya, I actually do. It's just a little floral and I don't wanna use it here."
So I said no. She offered to share her umbrella with me, and I gracefully accepted her kind offer. What the heck do you say to a cute girl offering to share an umbrella with you, anyway? "Nah, I'd prefer to be caught in the rain than share an umbrella with you!"?
I even offered to carry the umbrella, cause she's shorter than me. Luckily for me, the umbrella was small and she kinda leaned on my arm in order to get shelter. Smelled nice.
There you have it, the next time I see her, I could open my mouth and talk to her much easily. I should have more opportunities, since she takes Mr James' Bus as well.
Me: Hey, thanks for the umbrella the other day. You smelled nice. Cute: Oh, you're welco- What?! Me: Uh... The umbrella was kinda small, so... Cute: ... Me: ...
